concentrated cruelty and orange crush

judgement used to debase and destroy the soul and psyche

lifetimes of doting annihilation of life and love surrounding you

complete degradation of those you are supposed to build up

you are bound and  locked in a drunken stupor

self absorbed

we were hungry

lost and scared

begging for a scrap of life

backyard brawls and calloused remarks

the need for love crumbled away

with each punch thrown

kansas playing softly in the background

barely ten when assigned the role caretaker

adult by proxy

collecting skills to live life in turmoil

deemed unworthy of joy

opportunities denied

slipped through fingers like water

tethered to the jigsaw puzzle of insanity

a sick understanding of emotional propulsion, loneliness and void

pockets full

of excuses and reasons

fake smiles and apologies

evolution never complete

characteristics given in genetic boxes

overriding the miserable

hoping for gifts of hope

shining

no more mental terrorism, no mindfucks and manipulations

no more curses and cruelty, no condemning beauty to darkness

no more throwing words and hexes, no planting seeds of self doubt and fear

the pain cut into the forearm is screaming for help and compassion

sanguineness has never come from you

all life missed

all conversations muted

just too many chances tossed away with junk mail

there will be dancing and singing

tears and birth

loss and confusion

all beautiful

all worthy

all necessary

to find truth and bask in love

the essence of aurora borealis alive in the eyes of those you sentenced to hell

 

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