*trigger warning* sunshine on my face

i thought we had been carved of stone

one power, three goddesses

it was a romantic thought

 daydream, a silly wish on a silly star

how could i be a me alone

there was no me-only us

or that is what was whispered in my ear

frantic phone calls, sirens

holidays celebrated under suicide watch

getting  naked, tweaked-out mom into the car

calls from jails

calls from friends

calls from doctors

calls from children

fist fights

broken bones

blood, sweat, guts and tears

promises made then discarded

no honor among the deluded

coming into my home

wearing queer-phobia proudly

like a halston design pill hat

calculating, judging with unearned arrogance

looking as if shit was smeared on your upper lip

repossession of presents and pictures

decades of begging, pleading, bribing, stealing

i am mutilated and monsterous

begging for validation left my knees bleeding

then thaumaturgy! magic realizations:

love is not a chain tethering to ensure outcome

home is not an asylum with fear hiding in shadows

and there is the triple divinity that has always lived inside

me

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